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Emmys 2014

Let’s face it, who doesn’t love to watch to see who’s wearing who and who looks great and who looks… not so great, at each red carpet event? There are certain big star events that will always be top of the list, such as the Oscars and the BAFTAS, but when it comes to TV, it’s the Emmys. As ever, I found myself caring more about the beautiful dresses than the wins. Not that I was entirely oblivious – I just don’t watch all that much TV. I was especially chuffed (is that not the most English word ever?) to hear about Benedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman, and Jim Parsons’ wins (though as for the latter, how many consecutive years has he won an Emmy for best comedy actor now? Six? It’s a wonder they bother going through the nominations at all anymore!)

But anyway, I’m here to talk about the fashion, you’re here to see the fashion… here are a few (slight under-exaggeration) favourites from last night.

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Allison Williams in Giambattista Valli Couture

My love affair with the colour yellow continues, it seems. For such a dramatic dress, it’s really so simple; the yellow sash is the final touch that brings it all together and ups the drama by about 1000000000x. Very elegant but fun… I can’t help but see it as a modern take on a Grace Kelly design? Does anyone else see that?

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Betsy Brandt in Olivia & Alice

This dress should be too much, but it works so well. The blue/purple shoes are also a great choice – it can be tricky deciding on a shoe to go with such a canvas of colour as this, and I think most would have made the mistake of black or white… or red. I have such a clear image in mind as to how I would wear this dress; I’d wear it with a simple, fitted black jumper, a white bead collar necklace, and black suede kitten heels (yes, I know that I just stated that Brandt teaming black pumps with this dress would have been a mistake but just go with it…). It would look amazing.

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Camila Alves in Zuhair Murad

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Kate Walsh in Stephane Rolland

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Claire Danes in Givenchy

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Heidi Klum in Zac Posen

 Even though I doubt I could really pull off this colour, this is probably the dress from last night that I would love to see in my wardrobe most! In fact, no, forget it being in my wardrobe! This is the dress that I would most love to see on me… but you know, in pretty much any other colour but this one. It just wouldn’t work. On Heidi, however… wow.

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January Jones in Prabal Gurung

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Keke Palmer in Rubin Singer

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Teyonah Parris

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Lizzy Caplan in Donna Karan Atelier

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Lucy Liu in Zac Posen

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Michelle Dockery in Rosie Assoulin

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Natalie Dormer in J. Mendel

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Sarah Hyland in Christian Siriano

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Zooey Deschanel, channeling Marilyn-meets Audrey in Oscar de la Renta. I know it’s not the first time, but I still can’t get over just how different she looks without her fringe/bangs. She looks beautiful, but… ordinary, and then suddenly, the bangs are back and it’s such a ‘wow’ look in comparison. I’ve never seen so much power held in one fringe before.

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And the ones that missed a beat for me:

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Kelly Osbourne in Honor

Very few people can pull of this hair colour as well as Kelly Osbourne, and I love that she frequently incorporates similar violet-grey tones in her wardrobe, while the rest of us are still thinking about what works with our hair. Red heads should avoid pink (though I think The Little Mermaid proved that rule to be completely unnecessary), and stick with blues and greens, brunettes look great in any colour, and no one works pinks and reds better than blonds, etc etc. However, here, there’s too much lace. When your hairstyle is so out there, you should tone down the embellishments to an absolute minimum. Perhaps this would work on the right celebrity… but even then, I think a bodice would look much better, rather than this high necked, 3/4 sleeved top.

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Sarah Paulson in Armani Privé

The 1980s were a well known disaster, and it scares me how revived it has become in recent months on our runways. The spotted, tulle prom dresses were among the worst, and to see that one has managed to reemerge like this… do people never learn?

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Julianna Margulies in Narciso Rodriguez

I’ve seen dresses like this hanging in numerous charity shops; ill fitting, cheap fabrics, causing general confusion among staff and customers as to whether it ought to be displayed in the dress section, or the nightwear section. As for the visible bra straps at the back, it just makes the whole look tacky.

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Lena Dunham in Giambattista Valli

There are no words. I get that Lena Dunham is a big deal, especially in America, I get that everyone adores her for challenging celebrity stereotypes, especially regarding the ideal female figure, and good for her – so she should… there are too many dieting sheep in Hollywood, all conforming to the same rules, all fighting to look just the same as each other. She’s talented, she’s gorgeous, she’s humble and intelligent. However… far too often she just gets it so, so wrong, and this one is a doozy. The hair and eyebrow contrast, The weird grown-out bowl cut, the tattoo, and not to mention, that dress… which, by the way, looks amazing on the runway. Here, however, it’s frumpy, ill-fitting, unflattering, contrasts horrendously with that over-bleached ‘do, and basically gives her the appearance of someone who’s attending a halloween party dressed as an animated Pixar character… the story of a workaholic bird of prey, or something. I’m getting a bit bored of seeing her frumpy red carpet fashion again and again, if I’m honest. I’m just going to focus instead on her talents: acting, screenwriting, directing, producing… please, can someone take over her wardrobe, because Lena Dunham does not have a talent for fashion.

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Mayim Bialik in Oliver Tolentino

Mayim Bialik wrote for her official blog over at Kveller.com that she hoped that this year’s Emmy dress balances between ‘hot and holy’… while it’s not a bad dress, and I admire her for her strict rules on modesty in a world so set on showing as much skin as possible to gain attention, it just doesn’t… quite work. I feel like there’s too much lace (I’m sensing a pattern among the fashion police victims this year), which makes the whole thing too fussy, and tied in with that neckline, it’s all just too much.. way too much. The colour looks amazing on her though. Had she opted for satin, or something sleek, then I think it would have worked. I’d also love to see her with a sheer bateau neckline and sleeves, but would that be sticking with her modesty rule? Or is sheer fabric out?

(*Update, having just found this dress, I can confirm that she looks great with sheer sleeves and a wider neckline. She. Looks. Amazing.)

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Katherine Heigl

 I don’t know who Heigl is wearing here, and I have very little to say, except that it’s just too.. old.. too motherly.. too matronly. Much better things could have been made from this fabric.

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And the ones that I HATE…

Jennifer Lopez Golden Globes 2013

1. At first when I saw Jennifer Lopez’ dress, I was amazed, not because of the dress itself as such, but more just because I was thinking ‘wow, is she even wearing anything from the knees up, or did she just hire a body artist?!’ but then this thought trickled away and I actually looked at the dress itself… I am all for the whole ‘if you’ve got it, flaunt it’ trend, but there is a fine line between sexy flaunting and downright slutty…. I mean, I know there’s nude fabric protecting Ms Lopez’ modesty, its not just 100% lace, but still…. jeez.

Rachel Weisz Golden Globes 2013

2. I was so disappointed when I saw Rachel Weisz’ dress. I love her! She’s beautiful, she’s an amazing actress – have you not seen The Constant Gardener?! But this…? Damn it Rachel!

Sienna Miller Golden Globes 2013

3. Another big disappointment. I always look to Sienna Miller when I can’t quite decide what to wear or I’m stuck in a bit of a fashion rut… this dress was a bad choice 😦 I just don’t get it, it’s silly, its fussy, it looks like something my five year old sister would design… just no.

Lucy Lu Golden Globes 2013

4. At first, I put this Carolina Herrera dress straight into the Worst Dressed category . but it’s growing on me. I can’t decide if its because I’m starting to like the dress itself, or because it reminds me of a typical Tim Walker Vogue spread and therefore I, being a huge Tim Walker fan, want to photograph this dress! However, I do love how Lucy Liu has teamed it with a yellow clutch bag and casual fishtail braid! I never did master those damn fishtail braids before I decided to cut off all of my hair!

Lena Dunham Golden Globes 2013

5. Lena Dunham in Zac Posen….. love the dress… but not on her. It just doesn’t suit her, in my opinion… though the chocolate hue definitely does!

Kerry Washington Golden Globes 2013

6. Kerry Washington… nooooo. It’s just such a bizarre dress… Miu Miu, lovely colour, but I don’t understand this whole short under-dress, long sheer over-skirt thing – just as with Rachel Weisz’ dress. That’s a really strange trend for me, and I’ll be glad when it’s over!

Julianne Moore Golden Globes 2013

7. Julianne Moore is wearing a custom made Tom Ford dress… I love the dress, and I love Julianne Moore, but not together. I don’t think she has a defined enough waist to pull this off, and while I’m guessing the monochrome waist detail is supposed to bring in her waist, it just doesn’t… However, I do love the back of the dress!

Halle Berry Golden Globes 2013

8. Halle Berry.. I’m torn about this Versace gown.. the one shoulder look really suits her, in fact the entire dress from the waist up suits her, and I love the sheer fabric detail on the shoulder, but the cut out bodice is a mess :/ and it’s just too.. busy.

Giuliana Rancic Golden Globes 2013

9. Giuliana Rancic’s dress would be great for a Vogue Halloween party, but it’s just too gothic and cold for something like the Golden Globes. And it would have looked better had it actually been an off-the-shoulder dress, rather than having the weird nude-coloured fabric over her shoulders.

Jessica Chastain Golden Globes 2013

10. Finally… Jessica Chastain in Calvin Klein… the colour really suits her amazing hair colour.. buttttt.. the horrible baggy top of the dress really ruins her boobs!

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